Fathers who choose to be actively involved in their children's lives not only build stronger relationships with them, but also play an important role in creating a more balanced society. Victor is a father of two living in Costești, Ialoveni. He grew up with a dedicated father figure who had a profound impact on his life. “I remember spending quality time with my father, learning to do things with patience. That gave me a model of an involved father’s role, and now I want to offer the same experience to my children,” says Victor.

The decision to join the #FathersClub came from a desire to learn more about his role as a parent and to share the challenges and joys of fatherhood with other dads. “I chose to join the #FathersClub to build an open and deep relationship with my children, as well as to discover strategies that help me navigate the modern challenges of fatherhood. It is important to me that my children see me not only as an authority figure but as a trusted source of support.”

Victor aims to be an engaged father, promoting balance and collaboration between parents. Over the two months he has attended the club, he has discussed fathers’ roles in childcare and balancing professional and family life. Although the topics are very useful, he believes it would also be interesting to discuss managing sibling arguments. “The club has given me a space to share experiences and learn from other fathers’ stories. How do others handle children’s crisis situations or sibling conflicts? It would be helpful to also talk about ways to mitigate disputes between children,” Victor shares.

Being Involved: The Key to a Balanced Family

Engagement in his children’s lives has helped Victor understand the importance of being present and providing emotional support. “I’ve realized that to create a harmonious family environment, I need to be an example of calm and understanding. Every interaction with my children is an opportunity to show them how to communicate and resolve conflicts. That is the role of an involved parent.”

Victor has noticed a social trend where mothers are often pressured to take on all responsibilities related to raising and caring for children, while fathers remain secondary. “Often, even if fathers have time, they choose not to get involved, perhaps due to inherited traditions or societal pressures. When I pick up my children from kindergarten, I’m usually the only father among 10 mothers,” Victor notes.

He is convinced that fathers must be as involved as mothers in the day-to-day lives of their children. “Responsibilities related to raising children and household chores often fall solely on mothers. It’s a cultural legacy that must change. Only through involvement and communication can we build real connections with our children.”

“When I take the kids to the park, I often get questions like, ‘Where’s mom?’ or ‘Are you the nanny?’ It’s clear that society still holds outdated perceptions about fathers’ roles. I want to change that for my children. Being a father doesn’t just mean contributing financially but also being there for homework, preparing dinner, or listening to their stories from school.”

The Benefits of Equal Involvement

Victor has observed significant improvements in his communication and relationship with his children. “When a father is equally involved with the mother, the child feels it. My kids come to me to talk about their day, they feel heard and protected, and that gives them security.” Active parental participation contributes to a more harmonious family environment and the healthy development of children.

“When my wife is away, the kids know they can count on me. Whether it’s preparing meals, helping with homework, or talking about their day, I am there for them,” he adds. Victor hopes that his children, when they become parents, will adopt the same approach: “To be involved, to collaborate, and to build a family based on respect and equality.”

The Fathers’ Club – A Shift in Perspective

Participating in the #FathersClub has transformed Victor’s perspective on fatherhood, helping him realize that active involvement is not just a responsibility but also an opportunity to create lasting memories and shape his children’s future. “Every interaction with my children is a chance to offer them not only support but also a model of behavior. I feel responsible not only for meeting their needs but also for teaching them to become balanced and empathetic individuals.”

During club discussions, Victor heard stories from other fathers who faced similar challenges, offering him not only a new perspective but also the courage to explore his emotions and vulnerabilities. “Understanding that I’m not alone in this journey has helped me feel more confident in my approaches. Being a father means adapting, learning, and growing together with your children.”

Victor has realized that his role as a father is not limited to daily activities but also involves being a mentor, guide, and dialogue partner. “I want to cultivate an environment where my children feel free to express their emotions and approach sensitive topics without the fear of being judged,” he emphasizes.

This transformation in thinking and action drives him to aspire not just to be a good father but also a model of involvement and collaboration for the next generation. “I hope that through my example, my children will learn the importance of equality and mutual support within the family. Being an active father is a choice that will positively influence their lives,” concludes Victor.

The Fathers’ Club provides a space where fathers and future fathers receive resources and support to actively engage not only in raising and educating children but also in household tasks, promoting equality in the family and preventing violence. Fathers’ Clubs are organized in the districts of Fălești, Ștefan Vodă, Ialoveni, Căușeni, and in the municipality of Chișinău.

The Fathers’ Club is a project developed within the regional program “EU4Gender Equality: Together Against Gender Stereotypes and Gender-Based Violence,” funded by the European Union, implemented by UNFPA Moldova and UN Women Moldova with the support of CIDDC.